Watch how you dap me off, the gat might go off, BAP

- Smooth Jazz: Click here for Berube sounding off about the history of the atrocity known as "smooth jazz." Some funny stuff both in his lil’ rant and in the comments section. I fucking hate how Bill Withers and Stevie Wonder pop up on the Smooth Jazz stations occasionally. Ayo, Clear Channel: that shit ain’t fucking smooth jazz you fucking idiots.

- Best Text Message Ever: “Yo, Emil, I took a picture of this fly Jewish waitress. What’s your email address?” emilnassaratyahoodotcizzom, dog! Hit me up!

- Pete Rock never ran, never will… NOT: Ex-shrimper Mr. Byron Crawford is absolutely killing it right now with his “Top 5 gulliest Moments” he experienced while working in the record industry. Highlights include (a) a raunchy RA the rugged man story, (b) P-diddy whoopin’ Positive K’s ass so bad nobody ever heard from him again, and (c) Tragedy Kadafi pissing in an ice bucket at a bougie industry party. But, hands downs, the funniest shit is (d) this shit about Pete Rock. Hilarious.

- Who!: Government names posted this new Jae Millz song which is quite the banger. My buddy Scott Matelic put me up on it. I have been too lazy to rip it and upload it so I’m happy they did it… go get it from dem bols.

- Out of Touch?: I think I’m the only person left on the earth who listens to Modest Mouse but hasn’t read any David Eggers. His new book “How We Are Hungry” is getting praised/jocked like crazy all over the place. I need to get my hip-ness up or some shit and read dude.

- Next 100: And, last but not least, my Minneapolis-based crew of musical-makers Doomtree is featured in the new URB magazine. Buy the magazine—or just go to Tower Books an read the blurb. You will, however, immediately notice upon reading the blurb that I am not mentioned at all and thus the blurb is hardly worth reading… but read it anyway. Doomtree makes good music even though their/our website hasn’t been updated in how long? Get the fuck on that, dudes.

-e